almost at the finish line

okay. i am starting to forgive as well as accept. ate di is right. this may be a blessing in disguise. at least, i was saved from the wrong one. but i am not mad at him. i hate how he acted but, right now, i'm really concerned for him. i hope he finds someone whom he doesn't just like but also learns to show love for. someone who'll understand his moods and idiosyncrasies. i mean, i did but...oh well. i just wish him the best. i hope he finds peace of mind and true happiness. that's a wish for everyone actually.

i still want to talk. i just want to be friends again. i hate having a "non-friend" acquaintance. besides, i know that not a lot of people understand him. i'm no longer sure...maybe i was one of them. at the moment, i don't know whom he talks with...and i mean real conversations. but i hope he has at least one person he can really share stuff with. i don't know if i was one of those people. i really wish he has someone. everyone needs someone to gossip about their own lives with. haha. but seriously..when i kept all of these emotions to myself and my journal, i was such a wreck. and that went on for months. it's just really frustrating to keep all these bottled inside. i'm just concerned for him.

dear God, please watch over him. keep him safe. let him find his way to You. if he finds it difficult to confide with others, let him realize that You are there for him and will never forsake him. let him now that i, too, am here for him. i will always be his friend, even if he no longer wants to be mine.

i will no longer force him to talk with me. when he's ready, then we can talk. i know that i, too, may have wronged him in some ways and i hope that one day, he will find it in his heart to forgive me. i have already forgiven him, even if he doesn't seem to want my forgiveness.

i think i am okay now. maybe i am not 100% thru with the 3 stages, but i now i'm gonna be fine soon.