Junior High

I’ve been reading Sweet Valley Jr. High. Funny thing: even if I’m in 3rd year college, thre are a lot of “me” issues here. Haha. for example, Damon & Jessica. Not that I was obsessed in being a great GF (not that I’ve actually even been a GF, good or crummy, to anyone ever) but I did often wonder what the other person thought. Blah, blah….it’s just funny.

Ok, maybe not so much. I don’t know what he was thinking but, in some ways, Damon is so much better. Change is good. Sometimes you have to stick up for things but when you realize that something must be done (and this may entail changing something in yourself) in order for life (in general or yours or someone else’s) to become better.

I really did care about him. I did want to talk to him and, more importantly, him to talk to me. Because he did matter to me. We were friends first, after all. I had a genuine interest in being his true friend and, later on, perhaps a GG. Oh well. I guess it’s better for me because I do want someone who appreciates me and is also genuinely interested in being a true friend and confidant to me. I mean, honestly, those are the real “kilig” moments: when you realize you have true love for each other, and I stress “each other” (true love, too). Love shouldn’t and will never be a one way thing. And it’s not about kisses and hugs and dates or whatever. It’s about just living and being at peace with yourself and finding someone that increases that when you thought it couldn’t get better. It’s not about being saved or completed but about sharing life with comeone and vise versa.

Hmm…I guess I don’t love him that way anymore. Maybe I’m just projecting or something. The truth is, I know I’ve got work to do regarding all the aspects of my life so…I guess I better get a move on. I think I need to complete myself. Well, I know I do. I also know that as soon as I do, God will reveal the next step for me.