i just realized. it seems i go to this page when i have something i need to get off my chest but can't yet find a living thing to offload my frustrations unto. so here i go again!
i'm feeling a bit left out. everybody is at this training event and will be there for a few more days. they're all posting on FB about how incredible the experience is. i've heard them all talk before about how this annual program really brings them closer to each other. and i feel left out because i've never been to it. i know i'm not technically a part of the core group which attends the event, but only because i missed the training. yet i know in my heart that i serve just as much. everybody keeps telling me that "parang MV ka na rin". but then i'm not treated in the same way. i want to serve and i want to get to know these people better too. i'm terribly curious about what happens inside that house! i just don't understand why i have to be left out because of a mere technicality and why nobody ever bothered to help clarify this.
it's probably my fault too. when i got that message about the training more than a year ago, i should've asked them what it was for and what it's implications were, instead of just shrugging it off. but why am i so fixated on this? does it mean that much to me?
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